So this is me when I was about 21. I loved my cute outfit (still do) and took my figure for granted BUT I really disliked my natural looks. So I made myself look like this instead. 🥺
From bullying which started in nursery (nursery!) I was asked ‘What are you?!’ (meaning what mixture of races) and later told as a teen ‘You people aren’t welcome here’ by groups of adults on the street and teens quoting their parents.
THE MAKEOVER/OTHER So I straightened my natural dark, curly hair (and eventually put terrible yellow-blonde streaks in it); made my narrow mono-lid eyes look bigger by exaggerating my expression and clever makeup (which I’d reapply every hour); plucked my thick, dark eyebrows to nothing; contoured the crap out of my nose (obsessively checking it) and did this, frankly weird arse ‘smile’ so my lips looked thinner.
THE SAD THING IS, IT ACTUALLY WORKED! I got attention from white guys who only wanted one thing, often because they’d ‘never had a girl who’s exotic’ 😒🤮 African and Caribbean men said things like they were ‘proud’ to be with me as I had ‘lighter skin’ but they still thought I would be ‘acceptable’ to their family. 🙃🤯
AFTER QUITE A FEW YEARS several guys had asked why I wasn’t being my natural self and asked if I was ashamed of my heritage (still don’t know what it is to this day btw). I realised I was making myself MORE miserable by altering my natural appearance and I started questioning why I was doing this to myself?!
FINALLY I REALISED I’D RATHER BE LIKED BY FEW, FOR MY TRUE SELF, THAN LIKED (ONLY ON THE SURFACE) BY MANY.
TO EVERYONE READING THIS I promise you, you will find people who really appreciate you. More importantly, YOU need to appreciate you. 🤗
BUT if you have something that troubles you because it doesn’t seem to fit or doesn’t work well, I totally understand why you might want that particular thing altered a little. No judgment 💞
JUST PLEASE DON’T LOOSE YOUR WONDERFUL, INDIVIDUAL SELF.