You Know Those Items That Seem Perfect in Theory…?

Here’s a dress that was perfect on paper for nights out but just didn’t work for me in reality.

THE GOOD

1) It flattered my tummy 🤰🏻

2) It was above the knee

3) It was strappy

4) It had a low neck 🍈🍈

5) Very cool print 👻

THE BAD

1) It was actually too big on the bodice even laced at its tightest so it felt like it was wearing me!

2) The neckline managed to bury any hint of cleavage (quite a feat!) 🙅🏻‍♀️

3) The thick skirt sat stiffly on my knees, so I’d have preferred flirty, black netting that length instead. Cyndi Lauper/Gwen Stefani style

4) The grey tone drained all of the colour out of me 🧟‍♀️

I actually felt pressured to wear it because I’d been told that I looked ‘classy’ and ‘grown up’ and ‘so fancy!’ and I’d been looking for a dress so long. But as soon as my Bloke saw me in it he said “Great dress but it’s not you is?” “No it’s really not!” I was so relieved he’d recognised that.

LESSON LEARNED

Always trust your instincts, and wear what makes you feel, like your most confident and true self. Never feel that you have to do it justice. Return it, gift it, donate it to charity, sell it on Poshmark, just don’t put up with it!

What items have you bought that you thought would look great but just didn’t work and why?

🖤🍒Chrissie🍒🖤

Life Lately – June

June has flown by, which is weird considering I’ve been out of the house a whole…one time! I’ve been very grateful for the, frankly shite, weather Manchester has had this month, as it’s been a well needed break from the crazy heatwave of May.

Pride Month

My love and respect goes out to the LGBTQ community as always, whatever your sexuality and however you identify. I’ve always been proud that I live in a city with year-round acceptance (in a general sense) and awareness. I think this is thanks to the The Gay Village, plus a great Pride Parade and festival.

Food

Been switching all month between having cups of tea with sausage and mash to having a cold beers and mezze.

Independent Artist or Business

GDBEE Art is by Geneva who makes the most gorgeous graphic art of women of colour. She’s also created the webtoon Hovergirls, about two alien fighting cousins who work in a coffee shop by day. The entire Hovergirls series is available to read on phone/device or PC.

Lifestyle

I’ve changed my bedroom from being the place where stuff gets dumped, into a place where I actually want to spend time. a) I’ve had a big clean and tidy b) I’ve brought in more storage c) Updated a dark toned LOTR poster to a lighter toned and very neat dragon canvas d) I’ve reduced the amount of Funko Pops and books/papers piled everywhere.

Reading

The Getaway Girls by Dee McDonald is roadtrip comedy about three rather different friends, all past middle age, who decide they are unhappy with their lot and want to start a new adventure through France and Italy. I’ll review it once I’ve finished reading. I’m a third of the way in and enjoying it!

New Fringe

I was sick of my giant wavy fringe which needed cutting constantly and was way too hot and wide. I watched Birds of Prey (which I loved, but thought the bad guy was just plain annoying) and cut myself a new punky, shorter fringe. Freshly cut it looks a little too perfect but it does naturally have a lot of movement and looks spikey if I apply styling putty.

Here is me as a kid in the 80’s with a very different kind of fringe lol

I hope you’ve all been finding things to make you happy, in these turbulent times!

🖤✨Chrissie✨🖤

Monthly Life Update – March (Yup, I know we’re well into April)

March was a bit of a non-month really. Me and the bloke started our quarantine, apart from him having an hour in the park every few days. It’s a big park with wide paths and wide gates so no need to be anywhere near anyone else. A Submotion Orchestra gig (dub, orchestral, hip-hop) got cancelled which was sensible but sad. Luckily we hadn’t booked anything else or made plans to go anywhere else.

Lifestyle

In January I made a secret resolution to avoid gluten as it effects my breathing and doesn’t help with my naturally challenged memory and concentration skills, as well as making me bloated. I’m doing better with the above which is wonderful and I’ve have discovered I have a little square chin, rather than the two (or even three) rounded chins that I normally have. Bonus!

At first I thought the Jay was screeching at me for food, until I put some out and it ignored it. It carried on screeching right next me. I went into the kitchen at one point and noticed it stopped. I came back and it started. I realised it had looked at me, sat in my living room and decided I was too close to the branch that it had chosen and was shouting at me to go away! Erm…..!?

This is Little Groot, the huge chilli plant we cut right back to a tiny stump when it stopped giving us chilli’s. It’s a tenacious little fecker and has come back with a vengeance, which we hoped but didn’t really expect.

I find the trend of young women shaving the peach fuzz off their cheeks such a shame. It’s natural, your skin isn’t supposed to look as smooth and shiny as a Barbie Dolls and why are we adding yet another step in the relentless quest to look perfect’? Here’s me with my fluffy face (you can see it on the right hand side in contrast with the shadow) which most people find really sweet.

Style

I went through a pastel-goth moment (perfect style to cheer up grey, cold weather) and found this huge metal quote pin from Crazy Crafty Chick Club.

I’m still rocking my custom Airforce 1’s and find that they go with basically everything. I can fit my orthotics in them and I can wear my ankle brace with them too. If you need spacious, stable but fairly light weight footwear, these are dream shoes!

I’ve finally got all of the styles of boots I’ve ever wanted so I will not be buying any more, ever. The chunky pair are from Koi and the slimmer pair are from Newlook (detachable wings from Koi) and everything is vegan.

Beauty

I stumbled across this independent soap brand in Tesco of all places as it was the only soap left but it’s the best soap though, how odd!? Vegan, cruelty free and genuinely natural. They do a range for pets too!

Cheered myself up with a sparkly coral mani.

Food

I bought this beautiful vegan porcini mushroom sauce and gluten free gnocchi in a huge (and perfectly timed) shop from Ocado just before all of their delivery slots got maxed out.

First salad of the year! With Violife Greek Block (supposed to be feta, tastes exactly like goats cheese instead) and Gosh! Mediterranean Red Pepper Falafel. I do get boxes of cheap falafel mix from the corner shop as well but these are quick and easy for when I’m fatigued.

Amy’s Burritos are the perfect size between a snack and a meal. This one is the tofu breakfast scramble and there are several others with rice and one with cheesy baked-beans. So good!

I tried Violife extra cheesy block and ‘ham’ slices, which had such similar textures and even flavours, that they blended together to create one weird flavour in my sandwich. Fail! The ‘ham’ is perfect on a sarny with pickled onion/cauliflower or a teeny bit of mustard. The cheese is perfect on a sarny with spring onions or on a cracker with sandwich pickle.

What a strange, almost surreal month that was.

🖤✨Chrissie🖤✨

Simple Selfcare List for Brain, Body and Soul

Everyone needs a bit of motivation and simple reminders sometimes, especially when you’re in the house most of the time and loose track of time easily. That’s just me normally btw!

    Get the feck up (Maybe use needing the loo as an excuse to stay up)
    Brush teeth
    Wash (preferably with something that smells uplifting)
    Apply deodorant
    Skincare/bodycare routine (or at least some of it)
    Get dressed (oversized cardigans/hoodies totally count)
    Comb hair
    Coffee or protein smoothie
    Catch up with friends on social media or message them
    Do something a little creative
    Have something to eat
    Order or buy some fresh fruit or veg
    Wash clothes/Vac up?
    Read a book/Watch telly/Gaming/Exercise
    Make a nice meal, maybe enough to freeze a portion as a ready-meal
    Bath/Shower?
    Hug or FaceTime your family/pet/loved one
    Cleanse face
    Brush teeth
    Take a cup of water to bed
  • 🖤✨Chrissie✨🖤

    10 Positive Things My Disabilities Bring

    If this list serves as ‘inspiration porn’ for someone, then frickin fantastic!

    (there’s a full list of my disabilities and chronic illnesses at the bottom of this post)

    1. Being a very sensory person and also having a lot of extra movement in my hips and spine means I have natural rhythm to dance.
    2. My legs are surprisingly strong through them having to correct my balance constantly when I stand and walk. The Amazons have nothing on me lol
    3. I have a really fast metabolism which is great for never having to worry about getting overweight (just hangry) and it means I can totally justify ordering sides and desert. img_7655
    4. Being tall is handy to see where I’m meant to be going in a crowd. 5’8 is usually the same height as online clothing models so I know how clothes will fit me too.
    5. My immune system may attack me but cold and flu viruses beware, it’s effectively coming for you too!
    6. I struggle to keep up academically but I’ve always had loads of emotional intelligence. It helps me navigate social situations as I pick up on the subtext of what people are saying and doing. Thank goodness as I was way to too trusting!
    7. I have weirdly good balance and fine-motor skills if I really concentrate/hyperfocus
    8. Being hypermobile is really handy when trying to reach past a load of clutter or when something has rolled under furniture or for painting my toenails.
    9. I’ve gotten some interesting scars over the years from accidents but I also heal surprisingly quickly.
    10. Feeling different to everyone for numerous physical, sensory, neurological and emotional reasons that you don’t understand, makes you feel like a total freak at first but later helps you to understand and love your true, individual bad-ass self.
  • 🖤✨Chrissie✨🖤

    Note: Incase you wondering, the disabilities chronic illnesses I have are: Demyelination (usually as a result of Multiple Soroses ), Dyspraxia (effecting mental and physical cognitive skills but not intelligence; Neurological in nature), Aspergers (again not a mental-health issue just Neurologically diverse), Sensory Processing Disorder (imagine most of your senses are dialled up to 11; relating to Aspergers and Dyspraxia), allergies/food intolerances, PCOS (suspected by GP’s), Hyperthyroidism, Hypermobilty Syndrome (too loose/stretchy joints, ligaments, soft tissue, digestive issues). These all have the symptoms of chronic fatigue/brain fog in common.

    Would You Rather tag (with bonus christmas questions)

    I came across this on the awesome Hunida’s blog. It originated with The Newbury Girl  (I think) but I wanted to keep the chain going so I joined in!

    1. Would you rather lose all of your money or all your sentimental items?

    When I first read this question I immediately thought I’d want to keep sentimental items (I do have a giant shoe box as a ‘memory box’) but having no money would take away all of my independence and make me totally reliant on others. So it would have to be the items *sob*

    2. Would you rather experience unrequited love or never love at all?

    I don’t think I’d like to be incapable of love. The guys I’ve loved haven’t loved me back to the same extent and vice-versa. So to never be madly, intoxicatingly in love again would be okay with me!

    3. Would you rather own your own business or work for someone else?

    I don’t have the executive functioning to be my own executive (bad Aspie joke) and I’ve actually liked a lot of my bosses, so I’d work for someone else.

    4. Would you rather give up television (including streaming/YouTube) or reading?

    I get eye strain really easy when reading and I love that I can watch telly with people and chat about it.

    5. Would you rather give up sushi or tacos for the rest of your life?

    I’d give up tacos. The ones in the UK are really hard and crispy and just break in half as soon as you bight them. I love veggie sushi, it’s so refreshing but filing.

    6. Would you rather live in your hometown and never travel anywhere, or live in another country but never visit home?

    I have lived in my hometown all my life and love Manchester but it would be cool to live somewhere else and have my Dad visit me (he loves travelling btw).

    7. Would you rather live in the desert or live in a frozen tundra?

    Hmmm, extreme heat fatigue probs or terrible circulation probs. I’d be unconscious with the heat so frozen tundra it is.

    8. Would you rather eat dessert (but never dinner) or dinner (but never dessert)?

    I’m such a salty person – so to speak. I find a lot of deserts too sickly after a while.

    9. Would you rather run a successful blog or a successful YouTube channel?

    Blog! I hate the sound of my voice as my Dyspraxia means my pitch and tone can accidentally be a bit over the top (too dramatic) or really monotone (too sarcastic sounding), plus when I’m fatigued I sound a bit pissed, ha!

    10. Would you rather give up all makeup/cosmetics products or give up “dressing fashionably”?

    I need skincare but I actively try to avoid wearing anything that happens to be in fashion at the time. So I’d bin fashion (or the idea of things being in or out of fashion) in general actually.

    5 Bonus Christmas Questions!

    1. Christmas jumper or Christmas Jewellery?

    These 5 are my questions so I can cheat and say both jumper and jewellery, and a Crimbo scrunchy and pin badges and socks and…

    2. Classic or Contemporary Christmas Songs?

    Contemporary as in Stay Now by East 17 and All I Want For Christmas by Mariah.

    3. Christmas dinner with ALL of your family or dinner cooked by your fave chef in a restaurant?

    Well seeing as my Dad is going on holiday and he’s my only family, it would have to be a restaurant in this scenario. There’s a really fit Asian chef that was on Celebrity Masterchef this year.

    4. A big surprise present or five things off your wish list?

    As I’m (just about) financially stable and can’t buy my own stuff, I’d love a big surprise! Maybe a trip to see The Northern Lights.

    5. Snowball fight outside or ice skating at a rink?

    I tried to ice skate once, for fifteen terrifying minutes. I’m ace at snowball fights though, tactical and ruthless!

    ________________________________

    Please feel free to join in with this tag and include your own photos of your choices if you want, or just comment instead!

    🎄Chrissie🎄

    Breakfast, Dinner or Tea?

    I only got out of bed just over two and a half hours ago so who knows lol

    Corn thins with dairy free spread, cucumber, sun-dried tomato (out of a jar, not those plastic unrecyclable tubs, cheaper too) with oregano, artichoke hearts (again out of a jar) and jalapeños. I did eat a giant handful of salted, roasted cashews before this so protein isn’t an issue, for anyone wondering.

    🖤✨Chrissie✨🖤

    When People Still Don’t Get It After The 10,000 Time

    Don’t say it, don’t say it, don’t say it….

    When you have repeatedly explained your disability, symptoms and needs to someone, in every way you can think of and they still aren’t getting it.

    Breathe….

    I know it’s tempting to want to strangle them or head butt the desk repeatedly or scream – actually screaming into a pillow is very therapeutic – but eventually you will have to accept it and let it go for the sake of your mental health.

    Not everyone’s empathy works in the same way. Some people will instantly get it (whether they have experienced it or not) simply by listening and taking the info on board. Some people need to have experienced something similar for themselves so they literally know what you mean. Others, because it is different to their experiences will never, ever be fully onboard. Even if you have gone through something and they were witnessing it, they still won’t have learned from that past experience.

    Now, that’s not to say they don’t care and don’t want to understand. It is entirely possible for a person to sympathise, yet manage to say or do something ignorant and tactless purely by mistake.

    I guess what I’m saying is don’t take it personally and don’t beat your head against a brick wall (metaphorically I mean) by thinking you can change someone like that and enlighten them. Some people are all ready at their maximum capacity for understanding and empathising.

    Essentially at that point, it is up to them to get their own head around what you need and how you function. I’ve arrived at the conclusions at the start of this post. Trying to make someone understand, isn’t always worth your mental health or your relationship with them deteriorating. If they obviously care about you, sometimes you just have to accept that no matter how much they try, maybe they never will really get it and you have to be cool with that.

    Chrissie

    October & November Round-up

    I’ve been a bit of a nomad these past few months going between home, my blokes flat and his Dads. No wonder I haven’t been sleeping, my body doesn’t know where ‘my own bed’ actually is anymore! Here is a two month round-up for you.

    October (a fair bit)

    I reviewed this Maleficent tee which I bought from Pop In A Box who sell Funko Pops! but also other alternative pop-culture things.

    I was lucky enough to get gifted some products from my one of my fave natural brands Yaoh to review. Total skin saviours in the crazy changing Autumn weather.

    With Halloween coming up I put together a Modern Witchy OOTD. I’ve found that this style of dress is perfect if you want something over-the-knee and strappy but have a bit of belly as they emphasise the right curves and hide the ‘I’ve eaten way too much pizza’ kind. I also love this style of boot because they look stylish, don’t cut across legs mid-calf (which is never flattering) and the heel is low and chunky enough to support a wobbly wench like me.

    It was my blogs 6th birthday! I’m so glad that I’ve stuck with this particular blog for six whole years and that you’ve all stuck with me too. Thank you so much!

    Dyspraxia Awareness Week (7th-13th Oct) celebrated 30 years. For any posts I’ve written relating to Dyspraxia just type the word into the search bar on the lower right side of this blog.

    I reviewed Ciate Dewy Stix in Gleam Gold and had mixed feelings about it.

    I bought some seasonal and creepy-cute pins from Little Lefty Lou and Em & Sprout (the cat I’d previously bought from Punky Pins and it tends to spin around upside-down unfortunately).

    I put together 6 Simple Autumn Style Essentials as we all want to be stylish and warm!

    For Halloween I also treated myself to these pre-loved Monster High dolls from ebay which were about a quarter of the price they would have been new. One is a punky vampire and the other is a goth looking ghost. #stylegoals

    I reviewed Ciate polish in Paradise Lost – part of their Gelology collection as it’s perfect for Autumn and the upcoming party season.

    I compiled a list of Spooky TV Shows to Binge Watch – old and new.

    I was so happy to be gifted these beautiful Moonstone rings from Gemstone Silver Jewellery to give my thoughts on.

    I bought the oversized bat-wing jumper from Boohoo and lived in reviewed it. Why I look like the actor Ron Perlman in this particular photograph I don’t know.

    November (not so much)

    My hair was very happy that I reviewed this Shampoo and Conditioner from Yaoh but I begged to differ at one point!

    10 Cozy Ideas for Autumn & Winter. I love doing posts like this each year as it makes me feel all cozy and optimistic for the months ahead.

    I was gifted an Exercise (resistance) Band by Care Co. and had a lot of fun and some mishaps reviewing it.

    When Hunkemoller asked my to choose something from their range of PJ’s and loungewear range I knew I wanted these velour joggers immediately. Here’s what I thought of them.

    I thought it only fair to share My Autumn and Winter Skin and Hair Saviours with everyone.

    I’d say this photo pretty much sums up my October and November lol

    Chrissie

    Care Co – 4 Week Resistance Exercise Plan

    Pretty much every Physio I’ve seen has taken into account my little noodle arms, my easily misplaced balance and chronic fatigue and suggested I exercise with a resistance band. So when Care Co – who sell discount mobility aids – asked me to try out an item, that’s what I chose.

    What is it?

    The Exercise Band (£10) helps you to improve your muscles, fitness, control and co-ordination. You use it’s resistance and your own existing strength to build up more strength. This one smells strongly of latex and is a lovely teal colour. It has numbered positions on it to show you where to place your hands so you can increase the difficulty as you get past the first month.

    How and Why?

    The booklet contains a four week plan of six different exercises per week. It describes them with easy to follow instructions and illustrations (I’m not great at following instructions thanks to be Dyspraxic but I found this really simple) and also information on diet, general exercise tips and mental health tips, which I all found useful.

    I have Hypermobity Syndrome meaning my soft tissue, muscles and joints are too stretchy, flexible and weak so I’d have really preferred the band had a loop on each end to help me hold it better (the booklet does mention consulting your GP if you have joint problems, right at the start). It does have enough room to wrap it around your hands though, if you don’t mind them getting squished, which I didn’t. However, I did need to wear wrist supports when using this.

    I really enjoyed working my way through this plan and, I’m not going to lie, the novelty of this weird rubber band. It felt more like I was having fun rather than exercising but I also loved how structured the plan was as I have zero attention span and sporadic motivation, at best.

    The Shoulder Press totally defeated me however, as I just didn’t have the strength in weak two or three or four to stretch the band over my head. I actually lost my grip at one point and smacked myself in the jaw! Hardly the first time that I’ve done this over the years btw. My Dad tried it, who stays fairly fit for a bloke in his Seventies and he got it to his jaw, the same as me. My bloke tried it who’s 6’2″ and 16 stone and succeeded immediately. So it is possible!

    Can a giant rubber band really make a difference?

    I didn’t have the energy to use this everyday but it certainly encouraged me to use it when I did have some. I’ve gotten better at the exercises with practice and my balance and co-ordination have noticeably improved – a big deal for someone with Hypermobilty Syndrome and Dyspraxia (which also effects co-ordination). I also noticed that in just four weeks my muscles adapted to the new kinds of movements.

    My lower back was not happy at first but I realised it was because it was already incredibly tense from holding up my slightly floppy spine all day. A massage relaxed the muscles and I’d say the exercises will continue to make my core stronger in the future.

    The band immediately highlights your strengths and weaknesses so, if like me, you have chronic fatigue and have to pace your workouts, you could just focus more on the areas that need improvement and reduce the amount you do in just four weeks with the areas that don’t need it as much.

    Conclusion

    Overall I found the Care Co exercise band to be fun, incredibly versatile, confidence building, easily transportable and storable but more importantly, something that gives me a reason to exercise, rather than an excuse not to.

    Rating 4/5

    Chrissie