A women who wants the right to equal pay, the right have kids and a career or just the career, the right to sleep with who she wants, the right for her opinion on important issues to be heard, and who wishes the same for other women, is a feminist.
I applaud and support women like this.
However, you can take proving you are strong and independent a little too far.
I was a fairly tough chick who never used to show her emotions – well not the vulnerable ones any way. “Don’t hug me! If you hug me I might cry.” “That’s ok.” “Piss off!”
I would struggle for ages with something fiddly before begrudgingly asking for help.
I was rubbish at accepting advice, especially from a man because that would mean I was admitting I was weaker.
I was an idiot! Thankfully, my attitude has matured a lot since then.
It’s ok to let your guard down…
Like a million women out there, I go all giggly when a handsome bloke catches me off guard with a genuine compliment. I appreciate men offering me their hand when I’m walking down a slippery slope. When I’m cold and a dude puts his jacket around my shoulders I’m really happy. Not just because of the warmth but because of the gesture. When I feel poorly or blue a big bear hug from a lovely bloke cheers me up because I feel cared for.
I’m not remotely petite and girly but I love having a big bloke make me feel like I am.
I know I can look after myself most of the time but when walking home at night or when there’s a spider in the bath I want to be protect by a manly man.
When I’m doubting myself or having an emotional wobble I want to be held and told by someone bigger than me that it’ll be ok because they are there.
I appreciate good old fashioned chivalry and for a man to make me feel safe and special and to spoil me sometimes.
When we want that kind of male support it doesn’t make us weak or hypocritical. It doesn’t mean we are all just lost little girls that NEED men to control and rescue us. It’s simply that, it feels fantastic when you can let yourself be vulnerable enough with a man to admit you want help or reassurance and to accept it. Blokey bear hugs are the best!